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The year was 1979… The Bearded Man dusted the powdered sugar off his face (from eating a donut, of course), and brought his bell-bottomed a$$ and platform shoes straight to the dance floor. He was cutting a rug with Andy Warhol, Liza Minelli and more — they were all there, getting jiggy with it in a way that Will Smith couldn’t possibly comprehend… Through his glasses, The Bearded Man could barely distinguish the swirling lights as the walls seemed to melt away. Intense sweat dripped from their faces as they busted moves previously thought not humanly possible. The hours dripped away, and we’re pretty sure that a live alpaca walked in at some point, but then again, who knows… This was pushing the limit at its finest, this was gonzo dancing. Yes, those were the golden days, a feeling of being connected, a feeling that you were a part of something larger than yourself. The funk was strong in the steamy room, and the vibes were distinctly sexual. Things got weird. Things got intense. But then again, it was the 70s, so what more can you say? More myth than reality you might think, but you’d be wrong!

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